Christmas and the holiday season can be a mixed time of year, when we most need to feel more self empowered and less vulnerable. It’s a time to wind down, step back from our work and express love and gratitude to the people that really matter in our lives. It can also be intense, bringing old wounds and past disappointments to the surface.

3 Self Empowerment Steps To Having More Love in Your Life

Step 1 – If you’re being triggered emotionally by something someone that you care about has said or done, ask yourself “Do I want more love in my life, or do I always want to be right?”.

There are always multiple sides to any situation or disagreement. When we’re stuck in our ego, which is our self-protection default setting, we become rigid and fixed in our thinking and then up go the walls.  We’re right and they are wrong! Then nothing gets in, especially love. Studies in molecular biology show that holding grudges actually hurts you on a cellular level. It not only hurts you physically, it also keeps you stuck, feeling disempowered and like a victim. Remember that you get to choose how you respond to things.

Step 2 – Give others permission to be exactly who they are and take responsibility for your own emotional needs and care.

This involves letting go of your expectations for how others should be or how they should respond. Boundaries give you strategies.  If you’re clear on your boundaries and values, which is one of the key responsibilities of being an adult, then you’re able to look after yourself in your relationships. Clear boundaries give you a relational roadmap, and the psychological space to not be attached to or caught up in other people’s reactions, behaviours and dramas. When you know how to get your own needs met in a healthy and safe way – and give others permission to be who they are –  life becomes less stressful, more loving and abundant.

Step 3 – Say the word “love” regularly, to yourself and to the people you deeply care for and appreciate.

Tell others that you love them. Love is an incredibly powerful word. Have you noticed when you say the word “love” out loud it actually activates your heart centre and softens your feelings? It’s healing, powerful and feels good. It also helps to pull you back into your heart-centre – which is grounding and empowering.


3 self empowerment steps for more love and joy



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