by Janelle Legge | May 10, 2022 | Anxiety
Step away from the noise. Follow your own inner directives.
Learning to live with uncertainty requires a solid sense of self where you’re able to think independently and cope with whatever life delivers. Yet when the world is in a state of flux, it can take a lot of energy and self-coherence to not get pulled along with the panicked herd.
It can take a lot of inner reserve to be able to follow your own inner-directives, do your own thinking and research – and stay grounded and calm. More than 2 years into this ongoing atmospheric uncertainty and upheaval, cultivating a solid sense of Self is one of the most worthwhile things you can do amidst all of the alarmism and anomalies. We’ve had our senses bombarded with repetitive mind-numbing scripts for over 2 years now.
So if you’re feeling energetically and emotionally scattered and drained by all of this uncertainty and flux, reconnecting with your own inner guidance system is the best way to re-charge, reinvigorate and re-empower yourself.
It requires turning down the incessant noise and distraction so you can clear out the rubbish thoughts in your head and focus on what you need to do to raise the quality of your thinking, your vibration and your overall wellbeing.
Establish daily routines so you can connect with your own inner guidance
It’s taking a holistic approach. Setting up daily routines and good self-care regimes are the starting points for this. Yoga, exercise, spending time in nature, meditation and gratitude journaling are excellent grounding activities that bring you into the present moment so you can connect with that quiet, confident voice deep inside of you. You’re then better able to become aware of the quality of your daily thinking and start replacing negative thinking spirals with thoughts that empower, uplift and support you.
Uncertainty and the unknown triggers the primitive parts of your brain that’s hard-wired to constantly scan the terrain and look for danger or unusual patterns. Learning how to live with uncertainty requires over-riding the primitive-brain’s reactive rapid fight, flight or freeze responses – or to at least be able to step back, reflect and choose to respond more constructively to whatever’s going on.
Daily meditation (even 10-15 minutes a day is powerful and life-changing), yoga and other moving meditations help build your self-reflective capabilities. They help you connect deeply with yourself, how you’re feeling within your body and create the space to become aware of the thoughts that are dominating your consciousness moment to moment.
Listen to your intuition
People-pleasing or ignoring your inner voice to go along with the crowd, or what some in the media are telling you to do – when it just doesn’t feel right for you – not only damages your instincts, it seriously messes with your self-cohesion and erodes your self-confidence and your self-respect.
That quiet voice inside of you is there for a reason. Listen to it and find the additional information you need before making important decisions that can have lasting results and consequences. Because each time you ignore your own inner-directives you dull your instincts, undermine your self confidence and become disconnected from your own power.
Commit to your self and your wellbeing now
So what’s one thing you can do to better support and nourish yourself starting today? Just pick one thing that you can do each day and build up from there.
Back yourself. Trust yourself more. You’ve got this.
*If you’re feeling anxious and ungrounded book an online therapy session to get the support you need.
Tags: Anxiety Coping Strategies, Anxiety Relief, Intuition, Living with uncertainty, Mindfulness, Mindfulness in daily life, Motivation, Present moment, Self actualizing mindsets, Self Empowerment, Self Esteem Boost
by Janelle Legge | Jul 23, 2020 | Anxiety
Anxiety coping strategies for uncertain times lead to good mental health, more awareness, resilience, happiness, inner peace and calm. There’s the old saying “knowledge is power” and I’d add to that for today “awareness” is not only power, but the most potent way for you to disengage from collective fear and panic that’s just not serving anyone.
Never before has it been more critical to become more self aware, educated and informed so that you can take a more objective and constructive view of things.
When you’re being presented for months on end with statistics without any kind of meaningful or relevant context you have to step back and ask “What’s not being said/explained?”. Why aren’t the improvements, the recoveries and mildness of 98% of coronavirus cases being highlighted also? Why isn’t the fuller context being given?
You have to wonder about the level of consciousness of the people generating and broadcasting such negative messaging night after night – messaging that’s potentially far more harmful because of the mass fear and anxiety it creates which as we’re seeing has devastating mental, wellbeing, economic and societal impacts.
It’s widely known now how harmful stress, worry and negative thinking are to our immune systems and overall physical and mental health. The quality of our thoughts have a direct impact on our health, productivity, self-confidence and relationships.
5 Anxiety Coping Strategies For Uncertain Times
#1 Stay focused on the present moment and what’s going well
Let’s choose instead to focus on the present moment and the positives – where you have the most power and agency. Looking after yourself mentally, spiritually and physically so that you’re more present for yourself and the people who depend on you.
#2 Be the gatekeeper of your mind and focus
Key to this is taking care of your daily mindset and mental health – being the gatekeeper of the quality, accuracy and usefulness of the information you expose yourself to so that you’re not being bombarded and assaulted each day with alarmism which perpetuates feelings of fear and powerlessness and becomes addictive and hypnotic for some.
There are more positive and constructive sources of information out there if you use discernment and switch off from the nightly drama of sensationalist style news.
#3 Develop critical thinking skills
And if you don’t use critical thinking skills or listen to your own instincts and commonsense, particularly when you’re in uncharted terrain, you’re constantly giving your power away and that’s when you can slip into feelings of helplessness and inner despair.
#4 Take time out to detox your thinking, replenish and reboot
Even if you can only grab 15 minutes alone time for yourself each day, it’s worth the effort. Regular time out allows you to turn down the noise, clear out repetitive, negative thoughts and connect in with yourself and your own inner wisdom and guidance. For some people that’s having time out at their local cafe, for others it’s yoga, swimming, running, walking in nature or regular journaling. Find what works best for you and make it a regular date with yourself.
#5 Believe in yourself and learn how to hold the longer view
What you say to yourself every minute of each day is powerful. Staying grounded and at the same time optimistic and confident in your own abilities are vital skills during uncertainty. Regularly reminding yourself that you are strong, capable, healthy and resourceful builds self confidence and self belief. As does developing the stamina and resilience to be able to hold in mind the longer range view – that this situation will eventually become yesterday’s news. It’s about focusing on how you can use challenging situations to emerge healthier, more resilient and more aware.
Tags: Anxiety Coping Strategies, Anxiety Relief, Coronavirus, COVID 19, Fear, Health, How to back yourself, Mental Health, Mindfulness, Positive Mental Attitude, Positive mindset, Power of daily rhythms, Practice Self Care, Present moment, Purpose led living, Rewiring your brain for success, Self Awareness, Self Empowerment, self-care, Toxic Thoughts, Wellbeing, Worry
by Janelle Legge | Apr 2, 2017 | Anxiety |
Helping clients learn how to manage stress and anxiety naturally has been a core part of my business for over 17 years. I’ve been able to successfully help a lot of people blast through debilitating stress, anxiety and panic attacks using natural approaches. Giving them effective self-management steps and relevant insights that empower them for the rest of their lives.
So many people that I see that have been feeling stressed and anxious for years eventually end up with adrenal fatigue, physical, mental, and emotional burn-out. Or symptoms related to what used to be labelled chronic fatigue. A huge contributing factor to burning out and compromising your immune system is not being grounded and fully in your body. This scatters your vital energy all over the place and depletes you mentally, emotionally and physically.
Not being in your body and grounded often comes from growing up around an anxious parent, or in stressful, chaotic environments where you’ve been wired to be vigilant and outer-oriented in order to survive.
When being centred and grounded isn’t modelled to you growing up, you tend to over-think things. You also tend to not trust your heart’s wisdom and gut-instincts. Taking on too much and constantly putting restorative self-care on the back burner can become your default program for how you do life.
Stress is a natural part of life and something we all have to deal with at various times. It’s when you don’t know how to step out of over-thinking and over-doing to slow down and regroup that you start to pay a price. When this goes on for years it usually leads to burn-out and a vulnerable nervous system.
You can stop this from happening to you by getting in touch with your body’s wisdom. When you learn how to turn down the noise and distractions, you’re also able to tune into your intuition and inner-guidance.
How to Manage Stress and Anxiety Naturally: 3 Simple Steps
Image by Daniel Santalla
# 1 Exercise Mindfully
Activities like yoga, pilates, Qi Gong, or tai chi are perfect for getting you out of constant mind chatter and into your deeper being, and connected to the earth. It just takes one class to feel more relaxed, grounded, and less ‘mind-chatter dominant’. Whilst going to the gym is physical and great exercise, I don’t usually recommend it for grounding and mindfulness.
# 2 Connect with Nature
Spending regular time out in nature is incredibly therapeutic and grounding. Whether that be regular walks in the park, by the ocean, or out bushwalking. It’s a great way to switch off from repetitive stressful thinking, connect with the natural and grounding beauty on our planet – and breathe more deeply and mindfully.
# 3 Relax Deeply
Massage and therapeutic body work are great for pulling you out of your worry-mind. Physical therapies help you mindfully and deeply relax into your whole being. They are a powerful way to switch off and release thoughts and feelings that just don’t serve you, making you feel more centred, calm, and grounded.
Avoid the common trap of anxious over-thinking and overdoing that comes from not being fully grounded. It’s about having daily and weekly regimes in place so that you know how to manage stress and anxiety when it arises. Commit to grounding yourself and your energy on a regular basis. Do this and your nervous system and adrenals will benefit enormously. You’ll also start to enjoy longer stretches of stress and anxiety free periods.
Knowing how to manage stress and anxiety naturally is becoming an increasingly essential life skill in today’s rapidly changing world.
Title image by Mali Maeder
by Janelle Legge | Aug 16, 2016 | Anxiety |
Knowing how to make good decisions that support you is vital to living a fulfilling and self-directed life. It’s how you reach, and then exceed your potential. So if you’re constantly being pushed around by fear-based, anxiety driven thinking, it’s time to stop listening to your Lizard fear-brain and start making decisions from a more empowered place.
Fear-based thinking seems to be on the rise. This makes sense given what’s going on around the world. We’re living in incredibly fast-changing and dynamic times. Change is something that your Lizard brain, the more primitive part of your brain that takes care of fight, flight or freeze responses, just doesn’t like. But when you’re letting this survival-driven part of your brain run the show and inform all of your important decisions, you’re dramatically limiting the scope of your choices in life. And when you constantly do this you end up stagnating. You feel even more frustrated, anxious and uncertain.
Knowing how to make good decisions in life that aren’t subconsciously driven by fear is the antidote to resisting change and getting stuck at your current level of success.
Flipping From Fear To Self Confidence: How To Make Good Decisions
#1 Centre And Ground
The first essential step to learning how to overcome fear is knowing how to centre and ground yourself. This instantly puts you into the present moment. And when you’re fully in the moment, you’re not ruminating on the past or constantly fast forwarding into the future. You’re then able to self-reflect.
Here are some effective ways to do this:
Breathing techniques, moving meditations like yoga, drawing, painting, gardening, swimming, body work – any activity that gets your attention fully immersed and engaged in the now and that grounds your energy is always the first step in disengaging from your Lizard brain’s fear-based, worst case scenario thinking. It’s getting out of your head and into your body and the Now.
#2 Trust Your Intuition and Gut Feel
When you know how to stop getting caught up in negative thinking and self-defeating scripts you’re able to screen out all the noise and tune into your intuition and gut feel on what’s best for you. Often you already know what’s going to bring you the most joy, fulfilment and opportunity. But when you’re constantly letting your Lizard brain butt in and tell you why it’s not such a good idea, you end up doubting yourself, and can’t see the woods for the trees.
That little voice deep down inside of you is there for a reason.
The more you listen to it and take what it’s trying to tell you seriously, the stronger and more valuable it becomes. Intuition is a valuable source of data. An energetic, non-verbal read on what’s going on within and around you. Most successful people totally get the value of it. But it often gets dismissed as ‘woo woo women’s fluff’ in the West because it’s not logical or considered to be evidence-based. Yet the more you ignore your intuition, the more frustrated and unfulfilled you end up in the long run. So stop listening to the limbic-brain, fear-based people around you, and start paying attention to what your intuition is trying to tell you. It will change the quality of your present and future life.
#3 Surround Yourself With Positive Self-Confident People
To maintain a positive mindset so that you’re able to make good decisions, you need to have self-confidence and self-belief. If you’re struggling to take control of your Lizard brain and learn how to make good decisions in life that support and nourish your body, mind, and spirit – then you need to seek out positive can-do types who already know how to do this.
This is the fastest way to learn any new skill. Subconsciously you’ll start to absorb and model aspects of their behaviours, mindset, attitudes, and beliefs. That’s also why you need to be discerning around who you choose to spend the most time with. Because you’re impacted the most by the 3 to 5 people around you each day. So make sure they are people who are positive self-actualizers.
Don’t waste years buying into a part of your brain that’s just not designed to encourage you to seek out new opportunities and growth. Irrational fears, inner-resistance, and anxiety-driven faulty beliefs are the biggest success killers around. They create all kinds of maladaptive, negative thinking habits and behaviours that can be tricky to dismantle and replace with more realistic and supportive ones if you’ve been holding onto them for years. Save yourself time and sort it out now so that 10 years later you’re not in the same spot, feeling frustrated and exhausted.
![Feeling Overwhelmed With Life? 5 Ways To Turn Your Life Around [Case Study]](https://i0.wp.com/janellelegge.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/5-Things-You-Need-To-Do-To-Get-Out-Of-Overwhelm-Instagram.jpg?resize=400%2C300&ssl=1)
by Janelle Legge | Oct 23, 2015 | Anxiety |
Feeling overwhelmed with life is a slippery slope to stress, anxiety and low self-confidence. When you just sit with stress and it doesn’t get addressed, it eventually takes its toll on your body, your physical and mental health, your love life, your family life, career, everything. And if you’re a woman starting a business on your own, feeling overwhelmed and paralyzed can be part of the deal.
An Overwhelmed Mumpreneur
This was the case for Sara* (not her real name) who came to see me for some coping strategies for ongoing feelings of overwhelm that she’d been silently struggling with on her own. Sara had been in Sydney for almost a year, having moved here with her husband and 2 children after a long term stint living overseas. They had moved several times over the last few years because of her husband’s career.
Sara’s love of travel and living in different parts of the world had now turned to debilitating feelings of stress and overwhelm around the day to day requirements of life and setting up in a new place. She was stuck in a cycle of overwhelm that she didn’t know how to get out of. Routine things like doing the school drop off were becoming harder each day. Sara would spend ages deliberating over what to wear, how she looked, and ran through endless scenarios in her head around how she imagined she was being viewed by other people. She started to avoid talking to the other Mums when she dropped her kids at school, because she felt so bad about herself.
Sara’s Problem:
Sara had put her career on hold to be a full time Mum and was now in the process of starting a business working from home. But she was increasingly feeling overwhelmed with all of the things she needed to do. She was constantly comparing herself to other women who in her eyes were more confident, attractive and accomplished. Sara was trying to be the perfect mother and wife and build a successful business. But she wasn’t getting far in her new venture because of the endless self doubt and emotional burnout that was arising from the enormous pressure she had been placing on herself in just about every area of her life.
By the time Sara came to see me her confidence and self esteem had hit an all time low. Feeling overwhelmed had become a part of her daily life.
What became immediately clear was that Sara had over time let go of all of her self-care routines.
The Crux Of The Issue: Sara had routines and schedules set up for everyone else – except for herself.
Increasingly Sara had put everyone’s needs before her own. Her entire focus was on trying to be the ultimate mother and wife – and build a successful business. Sara’s expectations around perfectionism and success were like huge weights that she was carrying around 24×7. She’d lost connection with who she was before she got married and started a family – and starting her own business was her way of starting to reconnect with other parts of herself. But Sara had forgotten all about the day to day things that nourished and fulfilled her on a more personal level.
Regular self-care had been permanently put on the backburner and when this happens over long periods of time, stress and overwhelm begin to take over.
My Solution:
To fix this, one of the first priorities was coming up with daily and weekly self-care routines to address Sara’s overwhelm and reconnect her with her centre.
5 Things You Can Do To Get Out Of Overwhelm
These are the 5 things I got Sara to implement straight away that quickly turned her life around:
1. Establish A Morning Routine
Sara had been at the beck and call of her family for years. We looked at her carving time out for herself each day and getting a morning routine in place to set the tone for the rest of the day. For Sara, this was starting her day with 30 minutes of gentle yoga stretches, followed by a short meditation to ground and connect in with her centre, and simply observe whatever thoughts and feelings arose during this time.
2. Practice Mindfulness In Daily Life
Instead of always rushing to get things done, we looked at ways Sara could use mindfulness to be more in the present moment and feel less time-pressured, instead of continually fast forwarding into the future which was totally stressing her out. This included using mindfulness techniques and slowing down when eating, drinking, walking, and driving in the car, viewing delays as opportunities to stop, breathe more deeply, and relax.
3. Exercise Regularly
Sara used to swim so she scheduled in a morning each week for doing laps in the local pool. I also encouraged Sara to go to a weekly restorative yoga class to get her out of the home, relax and be in a different space.
4. Share Your Thoughts And Feelings
When you’re feeling overwhelmed you need to get out of your head. For Sara this meant scheduling date nights with her husband (which had fallen by the wayside) and making new friends. Sara needed to connect with the people that mattered in her life on a more intimate level and talk about what was on her mind. This included taking a risk and reaching out to some of the other women she had been so busy comparing herself to. Talking about your inner most thoughts and feelings with people you trust is a powerful way to reality check your fears and doubts, get fresh perspectives, and feel more supported and connected. It’s also a great way to tap into other people’s worlds and discover that they too can feel overwhelmed and insecure.
5. Establish A Calming Evening Routine
Like lots of people trying to deal with feeling overwhelmed, Sara was sitting up late at night when everyone else had gone to bed watching crime shows, late night news and drinking wine to unwind. She was overstimulating her nervous system watching TV late at night and at the same time trying to anaesthetize all of those uncomfortable thoughts and feelings that come with being overwhelmed. Which is a no-win situation. Wine regularly consumed, particularly late at night, is a depressant and disrupts the quality of your sleep. And so does spending hours zoned out in front of a computer screen or late night TV. We replaced this with a calming evening routine to prepare Sara for sleep. This included listening to relaxing music instead of watching TV and meditating for 15 minutes before going to sleep. Having a bath before bed is also good to include in your evening routine if you can as it helps you finish the day in a deeply relaxing and restorative way and prepares you for quality sleep.
The Outcome: How Sara Turned Her Life Around
Within a few weeks of following this routine, Sara noticed a huge difference. She felt more confident and optimistic about her life and was far less overwhelmed and stressed. We could then identify and address some of the core beliefs that had been driving Sara’s overwhelm.
Over the time I saw Sara, her relationship with her husband and children also improved. She was able to be more in the moment, her sense of humour returned, and she had more energy and clearer focus, because she was taking care of herself. Sara’s social life turned around too. She finally started to build new friendships and network with women who shared similar interests. Interestingly, by adding in her own routines, this gave Sara MORE time in her day for the things that really mattered. She was far more focused and productive. Sara was no longer feeling so overwhelmed by life and that she had to sort everything out on her own.
Take Away:
Adding one or all of these 5 things to your daily and weekly routine will get you out of overwhelm and change your life in positive ways too. One of my favourite reads on getting more into the present moment and out of overwhelm is The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.
For more hands-on practical tips to deal with overwhelm and stress:
SEE ALSO: How to Manage Stress And Anxiety Naturally
It’s always worth the effort sorting out your overwhelm issues. The biggest turning point for anyone on the path to a bigger life and more success is asking for help and not trying to do everything on your own.
SEE ALSO: Change Solutions – Personal Development
If you’re fed up with feeling paralyzed and overwhelmed and want a happier, more stress free and productive life email me at support@janellelegge.com to book an appointment.
*All identifying features, including names, have been changed in this case study to protect the privacy of my client.
by Janelle Legge | Oct 24, 2014 | Anxiety
Feeling anxious all the time often seems to come out of nowhere. When you’re feeling anxious all the time, it’s impossible to relax, think clearly and realistically about things and just be in the present moment.
If you can relate to this, then it’s time to sort through the muddle, stress and drama so you can reboot your mindset and steer your life back into powerful action.
To help, I’ve created a cheat sheet so you can get the insights and reality-checks you need to be anxiety-free once and for all:
Anxiety Cheat Sheet ©
1. Toxic relationship drama
One of the biggest culprits for anxiety are those toxic emotional-roller-coaster relationships that drain your energy and distort your take on reality. There’s one drama after another and it wears you down. Eventually you’re in such a muddle your common sense and self esteem have gone off on vacation and your self-confidence nose-dives. You lose YOU in the process. It’s no wonder you’re feeling anxious, you should be. If you can relate, then your daily mantra needs to be “I’m better off healthy and happy on my own, than being in a toxic relationship”. Your intuition and gut-feel always knows when you’re in a relationship or situation that’s just not good for you. The un-ease you’re feeling 24/7 is you trying to ignore the writing on the wall, pretending everything’s alright. When it’s not. It’s time to break the spell, rebuild your self esteem and attract better quality relationships.
2. Uber people pleasing
People pleasing never leads to win-win outcomes. It makes you come across as wishy washy. Difference and tension are essential alchemical ingredients for creativity and cultivating healthy interesting relationships that continually evolve. Every time you put someone else’s real or imagined needs before your own a part of you keeps tabs and gets resentful. This builds huge amounts of internal tension – at a cost. You’ll feel loads of anxiety most of the time because you’re constantly scanning other people and your environment for clues, instead of tuning into you. Get back on the self-actualizing-individuation path. Do authentic you from now on.
3. Ignoring your inner guidance
When the incessant noise of your mental chatter keeps drowning out what your heart and intuition are trying to tell you, you’re not going to be feeling too great. You need to turn down the noise and distractions. Tip: your heart holds a wealth of wisdom around what’s right for you. It’s part of your intuitive guidance system. This is where your real power and creative potential resides. Healthy constructive thinking needs to team-up and collaborate with your heart-based wisdom so you can do what’s best for you. You need quiet time alone and self-nourishing rituals to do this.
4. Being out of integrity with yourself
Going against your core values and what you know deep down to be true, is a sure-fire trigger for anxiety that can lead to depression and poor choices. Get clear on your values and internal code of ethics. Live by them. Having a clear take on how you do life gives you a powerful inner-guidance system for navigating the world and your relationships in a grounded and self-confident way. Correct self-alignment leads to wise decision-making and better quality outcomes.
5. Boundaries missing in action
If you don’t have clear personal boundaries you’re on a mission impossible to be treated with respect and get what you want and need in your relationships. You’re going to hit trouble. Everywhere you go. Because it’s a relational-jungle out there. Many people love to test boundaries, either openly or in a sneaky passive-aggressive-kind-of-way. Yet it’s boundaries that make us feel safe and secure. So if you’re not clear on your boundaries and how to put them into action with other people, you’re going to feel anxious. Your unconscious mind will be on red alert or overdrive. Because you don’t have safety strategies in place that come from having clear personal boundaries. So self-centred people on the take see you coming. The sooner you get clear on your personal boundaries and act on them, the sooner you’ll be treated with the respect you deserve and feel far less anxious.
Sorting through the muddle that’s making you feel anxious all of the time is what transmutes anxiety into self-awareness and clarity. That’s when you’re best equipped to make better choices and take more decisive action.
© 2014 | Janelle Legge
